What a blissful evening.

My baby treated me to a pedicure tonight for cooking him some din din last night, I went to the taj mahal of gyms tonight, and almost didnt smoke a smoke. Almost didnt equals I had 2 and not 5 like I seem to sometimes.  But the best part of the night was….bum da bum….. the eucalyptus sauna I engrossed myself in tonight.

That room was just the all over Vicks Vapor rub I have been missing.

Back to the not smoking.

I have come to the conclusion-I smoke. and my body has become addicted. oh man oh man-I have created a monster.

I am making steps to make this stop; this is far from okay to be needing a smokey smoke. I always thought I was wanting a cig until I realized I was needing one-like I did not feel good. NOOOOOOOO!

Times when I think cigs are smoked:

Morning. Lunch. End of work Day. At night when talking on the damn phone. Drinkies.

This is a lot of my life-I cant have this life-this is for some other kit-kat.

The healthier I stay the less the cig wanting will persist.

Damnt Stupid Smoking Monster I Have Created!

Also.

On my mind.

Me and the bf are becoming so close.

and.

It feels wonderful.

I know that I am falling to the pool of the L’ness word when what he says he wants I want them more for him then he does.

I want the mornings to be as bright and soft as possible.

I want the night to have open ended conversations.

I want health to creep its way into all parts.

I want eventful weekends-and even more relaxing Saturday mornings.

But even more…

I wish for his smile to never leave.  I am amazed by him and damnt he gots me.

bum.bum.bum.

F’n Love Struck.

and…… My stupid camera still remains broke.